So, I can't quite find the reference for this - but I'm sure it's a biblical principle! The thing is, not too long ago Dear Hubby & I realised that Bean needed some encouragement. For too long now all she has heard is...don't do that to Pea! Shush, Pea's asleep! Don't do that! Stop! No! Don't!
Bean has a very kind & generous heart. She's not malicious by nature. She hasn't been doing anything that is naughty. She has been a two-year-old, adjusting to life with a little sister. And all she has heard is NO! I know I wouldn't respond very well to that. We want to encourage our children to do good works, to have kind & gentle hearts. We don't want to exasperate them into rebellion.
Reality is though...we have a vulnerable little person living with us now. Bean needs instructing, so that Pea comes to no harm from her big sisters enthusiastic attention. How to balance these 2 things?
Well, in addition to our other discipline tools, we are now using a reward system! Hopefully this will inspire Bean to do good... In Bean's bedroom now hangs a reward chart, where she gets stickers for achieving certain goals that Dear Hubby & I agreed on. When the chart is full...Bean gets a surprise present. One that is all wrapped & looked after by Pea!
I know that this is not a new idea in raising children. The revelation, for us though, was to encourage Bean to doing good. To inspire her to keep self-control & make good choices in her heart. The tool reminds
all of us to look for the good in Bean...and stop focusing on the No's & Don't's. I needed the reminder as much as anything!
The results...3 weeks in we're already 2 presents down. Bean & I are enjoying a more loving relationship. Bean & Dear Hubby are loving hanging out. Pea & Bean - they've always been good!
